Ironic Regret

Ironic Regret….What is that? 

Let’s begin with Regret. Is that disappointment, wishing you didn’t lose something, missing out, lacking presence, making mistakes? These are questions, dear reader. Pondering regret.

And now ponder Irony. The opposite sprinkled with a dry humor, perhaps akin to sarcasm, shall we call it doublespeak? No.

Irony tells the truth where as doublespeak is all lies.  

Irony is attempting to meditate and the first three breaths feel so good that you spend the rest of the time planning all the other times you will meditate in the future.

The regret would be wishing you had meditated all those times when the future was in the past. 

What heals the life of ironic regret is forgiveness.

I would regret never taking the opportunity to try. I am willing to forgive myself for trying and failing, in essence, doing it differently. Perhaps a discovery is made. Accidents become epiphanies and give birth to solutions. This is the way we survive.

No one does this correctly. There is no right or wrong.

There are attempts, there’s the experience, and there is our capacity to forgive ourselves and each other if our attempts cause harm.

Recognizing that dissonance brings us closer to Beauty.

I send flowers to myself every night before I fall asleep. Flowers of forgiveness for any mistakes that have been made. Ironically, the more mistakes I make, the more gratitude I have, more learning occurs, and more compassion grows, though compassion needs not understand.

Understanding is not necessary for compassion.

When I wake , I send flowers to all my relations. I offer my efforts up each day to the benefit of all. I hug my daughter, give a smile to a stranger, send loving thoughts to those I do not know, to those who I do not understand, and ironically all of that is, in truth, given back to me. 

Flowers do not regret their dying, for they become the compost that feeds new life. 

I am the bouquet.

I am the compost in the earth.

I am the concept in the sky.

Flowers and Tears.

This is an excerpt I wrote while participating in a writing salon called The Narrative Method, which is a movement and model developed by therapist Shari Foos. Flowers and Tears is one of twelve core concepts that support self discovery and using writing to unleash our authenticity and honest expression.